Alright people. I really, really don't even know where to start. This weekend is so utterly eager to entertain you, it's standing in the wings praciticing jazz hands. You'd be making a grave mistake to hang at home.

Here are just a few things to keep you occupied. I would elaborate on each, but at the moment, I am sneaking this blog while the rest of the office is packing, in anticiaption of our move back to the glorious L.A. Times building downtown. What this means for you, dear comrades, is more hang-time for us all. Can I get a W00t? Thank you. Can I also get a sandwich? No? Dude.

Onward. What you're doing this weekend:

Friday:

Truxtop

Bukowski Fest

Saturday & Sunday:

Um, hello: Sunset Junction. Here's how to survive it.

Tofu Fest, the Fur Gallery and more options for non-Junctioners 

Video installation about kayaking down the L.A. Concrete Ditch River at Showcave

826LA's Mini Golf for Cheaters. (Vote Team Lone Pine, people. It's for the kids. Do it for the kids.)

Saturday night's got "The Red Shoes" at Hollywood Forever too. 

People, get out there. Get to it. Take pictures. We'll check back to make sure you're not home watching Xena in your underpants.

*UPDATE* 4:13 am
 

Had myself a Dewers and Diet at Truxtop, kicked it with Misha, plus our own Style Ryder and then high fived Jimmy Bleyer, who curated the show. 

But as the clock neared midnight, this Ward hightailed it downtown to hit the Broadway Bar for Metromix beeyotch Kimberly Waid's birthday.
 

I could have suh-WORN that they said her party was at the Broadway Bar, but I was simply Wardtarded: it was actually goin' down a block away at the Golden Gopher. I joined just in time to witness Miss Waid get her pout on and sport the most bitchingest necklace ever. Huzzah!
 

On the breezy drive up Western, Ward Patrol spotted some comrades at a little video-game peppered dive called Barcade, and rounded out the night witha solid 3.6 events attended. Not bad for a Friday. 

After four months of essentially taking squatter's land in Santa Monica and building an entire website while sustaining on microwave popcorn, (stolen) diet coke, increasingly frequent Coffee Bean runs, and the occasional meal (but really only once in a while), the Metromix team is moving back to the LA Times Building.

Know what that means...yep, it's time to clean out our refrigerator. I'll spare you the photo (disposable tupperware should not be disposed or left to decompose in company fridges). We all got a hoot out of Alexandra's definition of cleaning things out when she found this tube of green frosting.

That's right. She is eating processed green frosting from a Betty Crocker tube. 

Downtown here comes our frightening eating habits! Can you dig it?

Sunset Junction is this weekend, but before you go drink your brains out, might I pass along there three important things to you?

One: The rules to break if you want to survive the weekend.

Two: Where to get wasted.

Three: The bands to catch in between binge drinking.

I know: We Metromixers are always so prepared. 

Everyone keeps talking about how the 90's are back. Which leads me to wonder--what on earth are we going to do when that decade goes out of style? Start at ground zero with a Caveman Chic revival, and then work our way back up through the centuries, taking sartorial tips from Jesus and Mary (crown of thorns anyone?), then the druids, the Knights of the Round Table and of course, Salem's Witches?

Luckily, the 90s is more doable than most decades. For those of you who weren't cogniscent teen beings during that wonderful time (like I was), here's a run-down of all the small details that will make your new 90s-inspired lifestyle seem totally authentic.
   
1.    Use plum-colored hair mousse or a lemon to add streaks of color to your long knotted hair 

2.    Make sure your entire music collection is made up of compilation tapes

3.    Buy a pair of Nike Air Max

4.    Buy the same Benetton sweater, in 14 different colors

5.    Go away on vacation and return with cornrows   

7.   Talk about when Sweet Valley High was just a  book
   
8.   Wear only Levi's 501s, with gaping holes in each knee
  
9.  Watch early Baywatch re-runs 

10. Wear a Swatch watch

11. Buy a mood ring   

12. Wear shell suits and fanny packs in an entirely non-ironic way
  
13. Wear a black velvet choker with a little pendant hanging from it, even though you aren't a goth
   
14. Move to Beverly Hills 90210
   
15. Listen to Salt 'n' Pepa when your parents aren't around, on your cassette walkman (for bonus points), and share the headphones with your best friend who knows all the words (for double bonus points).

 
16. Wear ear muffs
   
17.Wear leggings with slouchy socks pulled up and hanging down a little

18.Complete the look with ankle boots

19. Pull the tongues out of your LA Gear runner-boots (which have flashing red lights on them)     

20. Wearing cycling shorts with the above mentioned runner-boots.
   
21.Say Scchhhwiiiing!! a lot and talk about how you wish you were hot like Alicia Silverstone    

22.Play with your Gameboy and ride the bus
  
23. Take ecstasy while wearing sweatpants